Analytics Pitfalls & Principles
The Auction Block
A Novel About Data, AI, and What Most Teams Get Wrong
By Brian Cariveau
Read the opening scene free ↓The Story
Sarah Chen just landed her dream job — Head of Analytics at ClassicMotors.io, a fast-growing startup. What she inherits is a nightmare: 47 dashboards nobody opens, a million users being celebrated as a vanity metric, and six months of analysis paralysis over a feature that could save the company.
She has 90 days to transform the analytics org. Or watch ClassicMotors die.
The Auction Block follows Sarah's journey from chaos to clarity — through the politics, the people problems, and the hard-won principles that separate analytics teams that deliver from ones that just stay busy.
If you've ever inherited a messy data org, fought for executive trust, or wondered why your team keeps building things nobody asked for — this story was written for you.
15 chapters. Every title will make you wince.
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Chapter 1
The Dashboard That Broke Everything
Sarah Chen sat in the parking lot of ClassicMotors.io headquarters, staring at a pristine 1967 Shelby GT500 in the visitor spot next to her.
She'd driven from Detroit in her sensible Accord, leaving behind fifteen years at General Motors. Leaving behind the VP of Analytics title. Leaving behind stock options that were about to vest.
For this.
A startup in a converted warehouse in San Jose with a Shelby as office decoration.
But that Shelby — God, that Shelby — was exactly why she was here.
* * *
Jack met her at the door, grinning. "You made it! Welcome to the madhouse."
He gave her the tour. The warehouse had exposed brick, vintage racing posters, and a rotating showcase of cars for auction. Today: the Shelby GT500, a 1972 Ferrari Daytona, and a mint 1985 Toyota Land Cruiser FJ60.
"We rotate cars through the office every week," Jack explained. "Keeps the team inspired. Reminds us why we're here."
Sarah smiled. This place had soul.
Then Jack introduced her to the data team.
Marcus pulled up a screen. "We have forty-seven dashboards."
Sarah blinked. "Forty-seven?"
"Forty-seven," Marcus confirmed. "Product asked for twelve. Marketing asked for eight. Finance asked for six. Sales wanted nine. Operations needed five. And then people kept asking for custom variations."
"How many people use them?" Sarah asked.
Marcus pulled up usage data. "About twelve percent of stakeholders log in regularly. Three dashboards get heavy use. The rest... barely touched."
Sarah did the math. They'd built 47 dashboards. Only 3 were used heavily. That meant 44 dashboards — 94% of their output — were gathering digital dust.
"So we're running a factory where ninety-four percent of our production goes straight to the landfill," Sarah said.
Marcus winced. "I mean... I guess that's one way to put it."
"That's the only way to put it," Sarah said. "This is a disaster."
What happens next?
Sarah has 90 days to fix it. Read the full story on Amazon or listen on your commute.
What Readers Are Saying
"I'm sad because I feel like I've been living in many of the analytics pain points for so long — but I remain really hopeful. This reading has helped me re-center, right on time."
Dean Furness
30 years in data & analytics
Kindle
"The stories feel real because they are real. If you've been in the game long enough, you'll see your own battle scars reflected in these pages."
Jackie Rondo
Verified Purchase
Paperback
"Refreshingly effective at naming the traps that derail even the most data-savvy teams. A surprisingly fast and easy read — without sacrificing any of the substance."
Nate
Master Black Belt & Chief of Staff
Kindle
The Principles Behind the Story
The Auction Block contains 48 analytics principles woven into Sarah Chen's journey. Want them as a quick-reference toolkit for your desk?